Post #222 – Women’s Memoirs, Writing Prompt – Matilda Butler
Details, Details, Details
When I teach, I emphasize the importance of providing details about scenes, people, emotions, senses, as well as time and place. Many writers begin to summarize and can quickly lose readers that way.
Details are the cure for writers who tell rather than show.
Once you agree about the value of detail oriented writing, the question narrows to “which details.” It’s true. You can’t provide details on everything and every person and every place. You need to pick and choose. When these details are done well, the reader will find herself in the story and fully engaged.
Case in Point
Case in point. Do you know Laurie R. King’s series featuring Mary Russell and Sherlock Holmes? If not, pick up one (the first volume is The Beekeeper’s Apprentice: or, On the Segregation of the Queen (A Mary Russell Mystery)
Which details to provide? What can just be mentioned and what needs exquisite details that will bring the reader into the story? Those are questions each author, fiction and nonfiction, faces. You cannot possibly describe everything. Yet well chosen descriptions can show the reader what the characters are experiencing. The detail may not relate to the larger theme or plot, but it is vital if you want your reader to become involved with the characters.
I’ve chosen the following section to show you how one talented author digs into details. Is this a book about making coffee? Obviously the answer is no. But understanding how the coffee is carefully prepared over an open fire and how it is a valued custom takes the reader into the scene and back into history.
Read this and see what you think. Consider details you can add that clarify a scene and will bring the reader into your story.
“…Ali shrugged and reached around the fire for an object like a giant’s spoon, a shallow pan with a long handle, which he placed on top of the burning sticks before standing and moving away from the fire corner. Mahmoud took his brother’s place at the fire, dropping to his heels and pulling open the drawstring of the leather pouch. He plunged his hand in, came up with a handful of pale grey-green beans, thumbed a few of them back into the bag, and then poured the rest into the skillet. It appeared that we had earned the right to a cup of coffee.
“Holmes had already warned me that in Arab countries, coffee-making was a long, drawn-out affair. We sat in silence watching Mahmoud’s utterly unhurried motions, swirling the beans across the pan. The small green dots changed color, grew dark, and finally began to sweat their fragrant oil. When they were shinny and slick and nearly burnt, Mahmoud picked up a large wooden mortar and with a flick of the wrist tipped the contents of the coffee skillet into it, spilling not a single bean. He set aside the skillet and took up a pestle, and began to pound the beans. At the first coffee crackled crisply under the pestle and tumbled back into the bottom of the mortar, but gradually the sound grew soft, and a rhythm grew up, the pounding alternating every few strokes with a swipe at the sides, where the coffee clung. The resulting sound was like a cross between a drum and a bell, quite musical and curiously soothing.
“Eventually the coffee was reduced to a powder, and Mahmoud set the mortar and pestle to one side and reaching for the incongruously homely English saucepan of steaming water that Ali had set to boil, filled from a skin hanging off the rafters. Picking up the tallest of three long, thin brass coffee-pots, he poured the ground coffee into it, followed by the steaming water. After a minute he skimmed off the foam and allowed the coffee to subside, then poured the mixture into a smaller pot with the same shape. He added a pinch of spice, stirred and skimmed it again, and finally poured the tar-like coffee into four tiny porcelain cups without handles that nested in the palm of his hand. It was unlike any Turkish coffee I had ever tasted, fragrant with cardamom and thick enough to spoon from the cup.” Laurie R. King, O Jerusalem, a Mary Russell and Sherlock Holmes story.
Writing Prompt: Add Those Details
I hope the quote got you thinking about details you can add to a scene. You may want to go back and read it a second time.
Writing Prompt #1. Take a scene you have written. Read through it slowly and ponder the various elements in your story that can be expanded by using details. Think of descriptions that will help to open your story. List 2 to 5 places where you could add at least a paragraph of detail. Then take the one that you think will enhance your story the most or will fascinate the reader and write it. Then go back and read your scene with the new paragraph included. I am sure you will find it to be richer.
Writing Prompt #2. Haven’t really started your memoir? That’s fine. In fact, it is great that you are working to build your writing skills before you embark on the road to memoir. I suggest that you think of a favorite childhood memory or family tale. The one that is told and retold. Take about 20 minutes to write it. Read through it, and then let the scene play in your head. Look at the details of what you see. Were you wearing oxford shoes? Were they scuffed? Were they newly polished? Did you have short hair, or have pigtails with yellow ribbons, or wear it loose? Think about all the details of the scene and choose one or two to write about, including the new paragraph(s) in the appropriate place(s). Now read your story out loud. Notice how much fuller the story has become. Notice the ways that the reader can become more intrigued, can join you in the story.
Hope you enjoy the quoted material as well as the addition of details to your own life stories.
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