Post #76 – Women’s Memoirs, Writing Prompt – Kendra Bonnett and Matilda Butler
Memoir and Observation
Recently, I took a train from Oregon to Washington. For part of the trip, two women and a baby were seated in front of me. I only knew of them what I could see through the space between their armrests and through their words.
View through the armrest.
A young woman handed her tiny infant to her mother. I saw the pale blue blanket and the grandmother’s right hand that frequently patted or adjusted the soft fleece, keeping the baby warm. Sometimes she gave a comforting pat when the baby kicked her legs. This gentle hand was well-lined and showed prominent blue veins although no liver spots. She probably wasn’t very elderly.
I saw a piece of the grandmother’s moss green sweater where it ended near her wrist. I also noticed the daughter’s dark purple cashmere sweater, it’s softness obvious when her mother reached over to touch her in what seemed to be a gesture born in love and admiration.
The grandmother frequently rubbed her thumbnail against the pad of her index finger, but only when she talked. Otherwise, her hands were still except for the occasional pat of the baby. Once she pulled the blanket back and rubbed the baby’s pink skin, her tiffany-mounted diamond ring glistening in the winter’s light.
This is all I could see, looking through their armrests.
The Sound of Their Voices
I never spoke to the two women. They never told me I was looking at three generations of women. It was all in the showing and the dialogue. Almost as soon as the daughter handed her mother the baby, the grandmother said, “Audrey is so calm.” Her daughter replied, “I don’t know where she gets it. Certainly not from Justin or me.”
Later, when changing the baby into a new outfit, the daughter said to her baby, “Look what Grandmother brought you.”
Memoir Writing Prompt
Two lessons here and a writing prompt:
Lesson 1. For a powerful memoir, consider the small details. Details, the particular, make the person in the story come alive. You may need to recall a specific time when you were around the person in other to come up with the small details. If the person is still alive, it might be helpful to observe the person even now as often habits continue throughout a lifetime. Consider, for example, the constant movement of the grandmother’s hands when she spoke contrasted with their quietness when she listened to her daughter.
Lesson 2. Another power tool for memoir is dialogue. Much of what we know about people and situations comes to us through dialogue. When writing a memoir, why not share that knowledge through dialogue. Dialogue informs and moves the story line forward.
Try This Memoir Writing Suggestion:
Go to your local library or other public place where you can sit and observe people in an unobtrusive way. Choose one person and watch closely. What is she wearing? what is she doing? How does she use her hands? What kinds of body movements do you notice? What can you surmise about her based on what you see?
Make detailed notes.
Then, think of someone in your memoir. Write as many details as you can — focused on just one incident. If the person is still living, visit the person and make mental notes of all the small behaviors that help define the person.
