Post #149 – Women’s Memoirs, Writing Prompt – Kendra Bonnett and Matilda Butler
Women’s Memoirs Welcomes Author Dawn Novotny
Every few months, Wow, Women on Writing contacts us when they feel they are representing an author who would be of special interest to you, our readers. Recently, they emailed us about Dawn Novotny who has just published her memoir: RagDoll Redeemed: Growing up in the Shadow of Marilyn Monroe
Once we heard Dawn’s story, we thought you would be quite interested. So interested, in fact, that we invited her to appear on our website twice. Today, we’re bringing you her thoughts on writing and sharing the few treasured stories every family has, even when most of them are terrible. It is a clear reminder to cherish all the good that has been in our lives. No one is 100 percent bad as you will see in Dawn’s article.
And what about you? If you have led a charmed life then you have much to share with your family and others. Even if your memoir needs to focus on the terrible in your life, continue to look for the good stories and remember to share them with family and friends.
Oh yes, I mentioned Dawn would be here twice. We’ve invited her back on this Friday, May 25 to share with you her experiences in marketing her new memoir.
Saving Your Family History with Storytelling
By Dawn Novotny
Many of us have family legacies and childhood memories that we’d rather forget. You know, wipe the slate clean and start from now–not look back, much less save and pass on. I did not know my biological father or his family. He never acknowledged me. My adoptive father was an abusive drunk. My mother and grandmother lived bleak lives with much suffering. These are not stories that I care to pass on to my grandchildren. I am sure there are many people who feel this way about their childhood memories but even those of us with the bleakest of lives have at least one memory to cherish, one that should be savored, saved and passed on to future generations. The following is my best pass-on story.
The year was 1952; I was seven years old. I could feel my mother tingling with excitement as we entered the five & dime department store. My mother had painstakingly put aside scarce household change in anticipation of this day. She was buying a Mother of God statue for her spiritually devout mother.
My grandmother wept with joy at the sight of her beloved Mary statue. It was a rare day of celebration with each of us allotted an extra bowl of potato soup and a glass of powdered milk.
Years later, after my grandmother died my mother kept the altar in her bedroom in the exact manner as her mother had done. The statues, the Lady of Fatima night light, the holy water, the rosary beads, all remained in the same order as grandmother had placed them on her altar. Some thirty three years after my grandmother’s death, my mother died.
Enter Rose, my mother’s neighbor, a crusty, stubborn, mouth-like-a-sailor, no-nonsense kind of gal. She wore flashy clothes and bright red lipstick. Rose was in her late eighties. After mother’s funeral, Rose asked if she could “borrow” the Mary statue for her newly acquired altar. Seems that Rose had a falling out with her local church and she wanted to perform her own nightly service. She asked me if I could obtain holy water for her. I was happy to assist in her hallow endeavor obtaining “holy water” from our local Episcopal priest.
Seven years later when Rose passed away, I requested that the Mary statue be returned, which her family graciously tendered. To my surprise and delight, the statue was covered in bright red lipstick where Rose must have kissed it as she completed her informal sacrament, made possible in Rose’s mind, by the blessing of the holy water.
Sixty years have passed since that enchanting shopping day at the five and dime store with my mother. This special event celebrated with an extra bowl of watery potato soup and a glass of powdered milk. The atmosphere held the feel of Christmas. I cannot help but think of that day as sacramental, an example of sharing “our daily bread”; my mother’s excited anticipation of her mother’s joy, my grandmother’s tears of elation, my jubilation at participating in their happiness, my mother’s subsequent comfort gleaned from the inheritance of her mother’s sacred objects and Rose’s peace and reverence garnered from a statue that she perceived as holy. Lastly the many years of grace and sweetness bestowed upon me as I reflect on my good fortune to stand upon the shoulders of these privately devoted, albeit somewhat eccentric, women. Through their daily rituals, these women were gifted with the presence, anticipation and joy of living their lives sacramentally.
I now have my own altar complete with Rose’s holy water. The Mary statue herself has long ago faded from her original beautiful colors and she is now discolored, chipped, glued in several places and just plain old. But I believe in miracles, prayers and holy energies. Can you imagine the bountiful collection of God’s graces, the myriad of unending fruits, the sorrows, the gratitudes, the comforts, and the peace held within the ancestry of this old statue.
One day when I pass on perhaps she will end up in a heap in some obscure place, but the comfort that her presence has bestowed on the young and old can never be diminished. This story makes me proud. It is a piece of family history worth saving and sharing through storytelling.
Memoir Writing Prompt
Do you have just one special story from your childhood? Is it a story that has grown or evolved over the year, making it even more important? If so, take the time right now to stop and write it down. Then find at least one person to share it with.
Dawn Novotny is a licensed clinician, teacher, author, and workshop leader, with a private practice in Sequim, Washington for the last twenty-seven years. She holds Master’s degrees in clinical social work, and theology, and is a nationally certified psychodramatist, has been an adjunct professor at Seattle University and an instructor at Peninsula Community College. Dawn brings her training and insights from her work in psychodrama to the page as an author of many articles about making ones implicit feelings explicit through the art forms of collage and the concreteness of exploring your life though self-representation or psychodrama. She feels passionate about the importance of personal stories as healing and transformation.
